Romance-Averse is a term that describes an individual who is personally repulsed by acts of romance.[1] One does not want to engage in a romantic relationship and may be uncomfortable with someone pursuing them in a romantic aspect under any circumstance.[2]

Romance-averse flag

Someone may feel disgust when expected to perform romantic gestures for others.[3] Some may feel slight annoyance towards public displays of romantic affection, while others may be favorable towards romance in media or enjoy watching other individuals interact in a romantic way, but only feel repulsion when the acts are directed at them.[4]

The term is commonly used by those on the aromantic spectrum, but is not exclusive.[5]

History

It is unknown when the term "romance-averse" was coined, but it has been used within the aromantic community for years. The idea of interaction stances was coined and given proper definitions by Reddit user AnonymousHermitCrab on the r/asexuality subreddit.[6]

Flags & Symbols

 
Romance-averse/repulsed/negative flag

The first romance-averse flag was created by Tumblr user Beyond MOGAI Pride Flags on January 15, 2018. However, the flag was also labeled as the "romance-repulsed" and "romance-negative" flag. The flag has no known meaning.[5]

An alternative flag was created by Reddit user That_Enby_Zev on the r/QueerVexillology subreddit. There is no known meaning behind the flag.[7]

Label Relationship Description
Friendship-Averse Counterpart When one is repulsed by platonic interaction involving themselves.
Romance-Ambivalent Counterpart When one has mixed or complicated feelings regarding romantic interaction.
Romance-Desired Opposite When one actively desires romantic interaction.
Romance-Drained Similar When one is repulsed by romantic interaction due to trauma or exhaustion.
Romance-Favorable Opposite When one is favorable towards or enjoys romantic interaction.
Romance-Indifferent Counterpart When one is indifferent towards romantic interaction.
Romance-Oscillating Counterpart When one's feelings towards romantic interaction change and/or fluctuate over time.
Romance-Piqued Opposite When one is favorable towards due to trauma recovery, mania or other causes.
Romance-Repulsed Similar When one is repulsed by romantic interaction.
Sex-Averse Counterpart When one is repulsed by sexual interaction involving themselves.
Touch-Averse Counterpart When one is repulsed by sensual interaction involving themselves.

Sources

  1. tiger_hoods12. “How Do You Feel about Romance?” Arocalypse, 22 Dec. 2024, www.arocalypse.com/topic/7604-how-do-you-feel-about-romance/. Accessed 26 May 2025.
  2. “Attitudes toward Romance or Sex – the Ace and Aro Advocacy Project.” The Ace and Aro Advocacy Project, taaap.org/learn/attitudes-toward-romance-or-sex/.
  3. uncle_SAM98. “Reddit - the Heart of the Internet.” Reddit.com, 2019, www.reddit.com/r/aromantic/comments/dajvdm/romanceaversion/. Accessed 26 May 2025.
  4. Merperson. “Romance Repulsion/Aversion.” Asexual Visibility and Education Network, 22 Aug. 2015, www.asexuality.org/en/topic/124252-romance-repulsionaversion/. Accessed 26 May 2025.
  5. 5.0 5.1 beyond-mogai-pride-flags. “Sex and Romance Negative/Repulsed/Averse Pride Flags.” Tumblr, 15 Jan. 2018, beyond-mogai-pride-flags.tumblr.com/post/169725646550/sex-and-romance-negativerepulsedaverse-pride.
  6. AnonymousHermitCrab. “Coining/Recoining Interaction Stance Terms.” Reddit, 27 Apr. 2022, www.reddit.com/r/asexuality/comments/ucy0kl/coiningrecoining_interaction_stance_terms/.
  7. That_Enby_Zev. “Reddit - the Heart of the Internet.” Reddit.com, 2023, www.reddit.com/r/QueerVexillology/comments/12ot9ad/romance_stances_flags_remake_stances_flags_remake/. Accessed 26 May 2025.